Only Happy when it Rains?

Ever heard the song?  Click here to hear it if you are interested.

Ever get the feeling when you are in the middle of a rainstorm that nothing is going quite right?  Suppose you take a step back and think about the sunshine or the rainbow, would that help with the situation?  Finding it tough to see the bright side in the darkness of your day or life?

I've been reading a lot of articles lately on the mind, how it works and the reason for certain emotions, etc.  I am really feeling smart reading about the random going ons of the mind, in general.  I am seriously starting to rethink my professional career decisions with this newfound interest in the brain and it's chemicals and the entire environment vs. family vs. life reasons why we end up the way we do... in there.

There are people who thrive on pain and depression.  Believe it or not, there are people who love life when it's bad, so much so that they literally seek it out.  It's practically engraved in them to look for people to surround themselves with who will do nothing but bring them down.  They gravitate to bad relationships and create problems of their own when they can't find a relationship that's bad enough.  Your drama queen friend, think they actually require drama to survive?  Isn't it possible, just maybe?

For some people, a still life isn't living.  Being drama free is impossible.

Admittedly, when I was younger, I found myself being drawn to the dramatic, craving the chaos.  I enjoyed the games that people play, so much so that if in a relationship that didn't have them I would cringe.  I felt restless in calm situations.  Thankfully it must have been a phase that I've completely grown out of.  Because now all I can do is look back with a grin and feel somewhat sad that it happened as such.

So... putting all this together isn't working so well for me, but perhaps being the drama queen was some kind of chemical imbalance.  Perhaps now that I'm older my chemicals have readjusted and I'm now looking for the perfect situation, I'm seeking the still life.  I'm ready to settle down and have children, I no longer need to play games with the people I'm close to in order to feel excited.  Life excites me now with no need for chaos.